CBA Recruitment 7200 The Quorum Oxford Business Park Oxford OX4 2JZ

I go to the annual CIPD event at Harrogate, not to exhibit but to look up old friends.  Which is how I came to be having coffee with Cynthia.

'Synchronicity', she said.  'There was I, thinking about a Fat Rascal, and you turn up.  You can take me to Bettys.'

I've known Cynthia since she was a personnel officer and I was just starting out finding candidates for jobs and jobs for candidates.  Ten years have gone by and now Cynthia is HR Director in a division employing more than 4,000 people.

'Do you know, there are people here who do their own recruiting?  Do you realise what that means?  Well, of course you realise what it means.  You do it for a living.'

She sniffed.

'I find it hard to believe.  Look.  How many people have you found for me over the years?'

'One or two,' I said cautiously.

'One or two.  And how many applicants do get when you advertise?'

'Well, we don't usually advertise.  We like to think we know our way around...'

'Yes, yes, spare me the professional mystique.  When you do advertise, how many applicants do you get?  A hundred?  Two hundred?'

'Sometimes more.  We found four General Managers for Canon.  We had nearly 700 applications.  But that was exceptional.'

'Nearly 700.  And do we have to sift them?  No. Because you do it.

'Psychometrics. Do we have to arrange that?  No. Because you do that, too, and you tell us what they say.

'References!  What a fag they are.  But do we have to take them?  No.  Because you take references and you pass them on to us.  Before we even make an offer.

'Then there's academic and professional qualifications.  If you tell us this person has a 2:1 in Maths from Reading, or a Fellowship with the Institute of Marketing, we know that's what they've got because we know you've checked.

'Assessment events.  If we want you to run them for us, to check competences, you do that.

'And we know, when you give us your shortlist of candidates, that you're going to rank them for us in the order you see them.  Based on the psychometrics and the structured interviewing and the rest of the gubbins.'

She gave me what - for Cynthia - was almost a fond look.

'I'll tell you what, John.  CBA Recruitment can go on doing our recruiting for as long as you like.  Because you take all the donkey work out of it.'

She brightened.

'Hey, if you guys do all the donkey work, I guess that must make you the...'

'Thank you Cynthia, I get the picture.'

'Would you like some more good news?'

'I can hardly wait.'

'I'm going to let you buy me another fat Rascal.'